For W to Keep Upon Finding

"What’s this feeling?
My love will rip a skylight in the ceiling…
Give myself to you from the essence of my being" - Matisyahu

This is for the better, baby
This is for the best

Slowly my head will learn not to look down your street as I make my way home
Slowly the license plates that bear your name won’t burn my eyes
Suddenly the gym doesn’t need to be squeezed in
And I can stay as late as I want at work
It feels good to flirt again
It feels good to be free
It feels good to pay as much toll as I want to
But slowly the city that I’ve grown to love and hate will swallow me whole
My cells will regenerate and I’ll become someone else
And every memory that I’ve involuntarily assigned to your smile and kisses will fade away into something elseness
For now they still steal my breath

We went to every one of my refuges
Now my soul has no safe house
Your name doesn’t just flutter easily in the breeze
It is a typhoon that engulfs me
Storm swells that punish me
Yet I can see blue skies in the middle
This is achingly painful yet strangely ok
This is the best thing we could have done for each other
My only escape is my car
But even then I can’t bring myself to look at the empty seat to my left
For now at least

For now at least I can’t touch anything that doesn’t have your name emblazoned upon it
And there is so much
Too much
So we extricate our lives from each other from a safe distance.
I’m only beginning to shoot the time lapse photography of the dismantling of our love
F r a m e
B y
H e a r t
B r e a k i n g
F r a m e
And I won’t call you baby anymore
Won’t call you baby...

I’ve always understood but never accepted
You’d try to jump but I’d keep the tether on
Finally I get it, I’m letting go, you are free.
Find someone who’ll worship you as I did but do him a favor and work just as hard
Don’t listen to your loneliness or give in to mine

For now at least I’m looking to the heavens for new safe havens for my wellbeing
You are welcome to keep everything else, with no prejudice
So far I’ve got a lake, 2 more ocean views, and a waterfall that are mine all alone
Learning that you’ve got to find these places on your own
Learning that their beauty is enhanced because I can’t find you within the waters

Yet you are so eternally beautiful
And I’ll always see you at sunsets and good food